By John Shin, MD

It can be very difficult if someone does not know what they want out of life and even harder if they know what they want, but do not know how to make it happen. A person can meander aimlessly without a sense of purpose or goals in life. Even if a person can determine what their purpose or goals might be, it is only a “pipe dream” or fantasy without a plan to execute it.  However, they can use a solution-focused, goal setting, problem-solving procedure to turn a dream into reality.  If you are hoping to turn a dream into your reality, a three-step process can help you. This article describes a method which may be useful in establishing and accomplishing goals to reach a dream.

First, you must visualize in exquisite detail what you want. You need to practice picturing yourself doing what you desire. You need to be able to discuss it in such detail that others will also know exactly what you want. You should be able to describe it with all your senses. If applicable, describe what it feels like, what it smells like, what it tastes like, what it looks like and what it sounds like. The more specific the details, the better it is for you to create a plan to make it happen.

Second, you need to list all the people or resources you may need to accomplish what you want. It may be a list stating what you need to do and what assistance you might require from others such as your family, friends, professionals, or agencies that have experience or expertise in what you want. It will help for you to brainstorm and list as many resources as possible you could reasonably access. Identifying and potentially using as many resources as possible will make it more likely that you will be able to accomplish your goals.

Third, you need to break down your ideas into small steps that are more easily managed and that you can accomplish so the tasks do not seem so overwhelming. Taking small steps and understanding the best order to take the steps will help to achieve your overall objective.

What could this look like?  Suppose you are stuck in a dead-end job and that you are really dissatisfied. You are bored and not making much money and would really prefer doing almost anything else. As you think about what you like to do, you realize you like building things, fixing things, and doing projects around the home. In thinking about these things, you think about someone you know who makes a very good living doing plumbing services and you decide you also want to be a plumber. However, you are concerned that it might be impossible for you because you did not graduate high school and it might be costly.

Using the three-step process, you can establish a plan for making your “dream” turn into a reality. First you must visualize many details of what it might be like being a plumber. You might envision yourself getting a call from a customer wanting your services and they are so thankful that you will try to help them fix their problem. You might see yourself getting a cup of coffee while driving to your client’s home thinking about what the possible problems and solutions might be. You might see yourself knocking on the door and going into the house. You might imagine the homeowner being so pleased that you have shown up to help as they describe to you what is going wrong with their plumbing. You might visualize looking at the plumbing and realizing that you know what is wrong and that you are confident that you can fix it. You can see yourself getting dirty and grimy during the process of your hard work, but it is very satisfying to you.  You can see yourself cleaning up the project area, cleaning yourself, getting paid (perhaps by credit card!), and you can see yourself smiling about a job well done, having a satisfied customer, and feeling proud of yourself as you think of what you could earn as a plumber.

Second, you think of all the resources you might need and begin making a list of who and what will be helpful and necessary as you plan to become a plumber. You could talk to the person you already know who is a plumber and making a successful career with that skill; perhaps you could shadow them or volunteer to be their helper for a few days to see what the work is really like; you could research what training you will need to have and research whether it would be helpful to become licensed as a plumber; you might need to talk to other professional plumbers or business owners to help you know the most effective methods for training; you might learn that you could get training at a community college or a trade school; you could set up a meeting with a local community college admission advisor; you could talk to family and friends, and the college advisor, about various ideas for financial assistance to help pay for the training. You might learn that you could obtain a GED to get into community college since you do not have your high school diploma. You might recall that you did not graduate high school because you had problems focusing on schoolwork and getting a GED or going through training for plumbing seems like it might be too much for you, but the community college advisor describes resources available to help you at the college and other ideas including assistance from a health professional, or aid from family and friends with studying. The list of resources may get longer as you think about what you might need to become a plumber, but you discover that it is more helpful to have the list of ideas and options and not have to use them than it is to feel unprepared.

And in the third step in the Solution-Focused process for turning a dream into a reality, you must break down the ideas into smaller more easily managed steps or tasks and create a plan for doing each step to accomplish your bigger goal of becoming a plumber. Your third step will include thinking about what tasks you must do and in what order. It might be broken down into the following tasks:  You decide you will continue to work at your current job temporarily because it is familiar and easier than trying something different since you must have money to pay for the GED and the plumbing training. You reach out to friends and family to help with studying for the GED. You decide that you must address your focusing issues so that getting both the GED and the training for plumbing will be easier and less frustrating than what you remember about school growing up. You decide to ask for help from a medical professional because of the recommendations of college advisors and a couple of your friends who have similar problems. You learn that you have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and you get the desired professional help and treatment and you pass the GED with no problem! Then you move on to the next steps which are applying to and then attending community college. You feel eager to learn and excited to become a professional plumber. You plan for your graduation and you use the college resources to develop a job resume and practice for job interviews. You obtain a plumbing job and then start working as a fully trained and licensed plumber. You made a dream turn into a reality!

This solution-focused process, with goal setting may help you achieve your own dream. It may be a good way to get more motivated in your life. Having a dream with goals that you can clearly imagine, and having a strategy and a plan, may be helpful for you to discover and achieve your life’s purpose.